How are we?
I have been toying with this post for a while, and I finally feel like I want to speak up because I believe when you share your feelings it helps. I don't want anyone to think I am fishing for compliments because I am really not, I just feel like I want to get this off my chest.
For the last year my blogging activity has been very sporadic, and I put it down to no motivation but if I am honest with myself and with you guys it was because I have really been struggling with my self esteem and didn't want to take pictures of myself.
Anyone who knows me well, will tell you I am super confident and they would never believe it, but just as most girls do I struggle with insecurities about my weight. In the last year I have put on about 1.5 stone, or 20lbs or almost 10kg which has really affected me.
I have tried to lose the weight but I can't seem to focus long enough to make a difference, a big problem for me is I'm an emotional eater and I get really mentally drained which means I find it hard to exercise. The last year has been very stressful from me and it really impacted how I felt about myself. We put in an offer on our house in May 2014, then in July just as we were about to complete the house was flooded. I was constantly in contact with the solicitors, bank and sellers to sort out the issues. In that time I was really struggling at work, without going into detail I was made to feel like I was not good enough, so I made the decision to find a new role. I found a new role and in October 2014 (the weekend before I started my new job) we finally moved into the house.
Now you're probably thinking that things calmed down but to be honest they didn't. I hated my new job and I was so unhappy. I left for a temporary role and since then I have be trying to find a permanent role which in itself is very hard work. All in all it has been a hard few months.
While I will continue to working on getting myself back to where I want to be, I also want to focus on self acceptance and get back into blogging, so I am starting by trying to take more pictures of myself.
Anyway enough of my rambling, I hope this post helps anyone who is having a hard time at the moment, you are not alone, we all have down periods. We just need to remember it won't last and we are stronger that we give ourselves credit for.
If anyone wants to talk, please feel free to give me a shout.
Ciao for now
Love Mrs Berto xx